My first emotion was anger! I wish I could say it passed quickly but alas it did not. This morning we went to visit Mary's Home. Our home for girls. The girls were great. At least till I saw a young man standing with 2 twin girls. Tam, able to often read my emotion often quicker than I can identify them. She made me aware this is the father of the new twins who will come to live here.
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First thing she did was hide in the corner... |
I quickly said he can't come and bring his daughters drinks, not fair to others. She reminded me I had asked to meet the twins and they were not yet living with us. Okay then the anger began to set in. I sat and wondered how does a father leave his own children at a home!
Tam trying to explain that the father had divorced their mother. The mom took the girls. He could not find them until recently. The mom had married another man, had 2 more children. And took her first 2 daughters to her mothers. They now live with a grandmother who is old and unable to keep them. Poverty at a level that she is even unable to send them to school!
They're now 8 years old and don't know how to read, write or even count to 10. I watched as my team tried to engage the girls. 1 quickly moved into a corner hiding her face into it. Later to be found hiding under a bed... Broke my heart. When I feel this type of emotion too often I TURN TO ANGER... MORE MANLY RIGHT? OK, WRONG but that's where I went!
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Soon trying to hide under the bed, before she tried to run outside and down the street! |
I sat and watched the girls of Mary's introduce themselves, telling our guests what they like to do, but I kept focusing on the father, how could he.... Tam told me that his own family had all passed away. And that he could not keep them. Still doing my best not to keep looking at him because I knew my face tells my emotions all too quickly! I had this nagging that I should go and shake the father's hand. Eventually I did. Put a smile on my face. Remembering that my goal in recent days is to be nice.
I watched the father as his girls sat with him, one still in the corner. Tam engaging with her. The other sitting the next to her dad, both knowing that 1 more time they are going to be abandoned Then I began to realize I just don't understand the circumstances that would make a father do this. I just don't get it! But that is the case all too often.
I looked around and the other girls and realized this too is the story of many of them.
Tam brought the young lady I lovingly call "Always". She too had the same story. She now 21 and in 11thgrade. I hope you read her story last month. In it she told that when I gave her the name "Always" she k new that I and gibtk will always be there for her. No more abandonment for her! Okay now I'm fighting back tears....
I looked at another couple of twin girls who joined our family recently. Looking how the girls of Mary's were holding them and playing with them. I knew that our girls and team would now give the love these newest twins would have. It brought great joy to me to see always engaging with our newest twins. The one from the corner was now laughing and coloring. Then saw guest favorite, Chip Chip sitting and teaching the one that hid how to count... WOW!!!
The plan is for the next few days the dad will drop them off picking them up in the afternoon. Giving the new twins a chance to get used to the new family of Mary's and gibtk. My girl (who I have special place in my heart for) committed to spending the next few days with our new twins. She's my hero! And one day I truly hope will be part of our team as staff!
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Chip Chip teaching one how to count... |
Then we went to Hals Home compound where the Mary's home leader came up and asked how I felt when I meet the new twins. I told her angry! And "tried" to explain... she interrupted me saying, "Robert you do not understand! They are very fortunate to be able to come and live there!" Then I realized the team member I was speaking to had lived with us since she was in 3rdgrade. Now a University grad and full time gibtk team member. I nodded then said who would better understand then you. Asking her, "do you think you'd be the lady you are today if your family did not bring you to us?" She conclusively said "No WAY!"
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Girls from Mary's loving on another twins which came about 1 month ago. |
I almost can say I sorta understand. I am so glad I have lived a privileged life. Never having to be faced with decision like this poor father has to make. That the concept of deciding I can't and having to find a safe place for my daughter to grow up. I guess I gotta admit that he's a brave man to make the decision of what's best for his girls. One day I hope he will be able to come and see his daughters graduate from University or college.
I know that these and all the kids of gibtk will be ok! In fact they will excel! Our newest twins will learn to read and write. To interact and one day accept the father's hugs I so want to give them. I am so grateful that there is an organization called Giving it back to Kids! I know that without your prays, words of encouragement and financial support we would not be able to have a place for these kids to come, to learn what love is and to be loved.
><((((º> BBlessed
www.gibtk.org
Robert Kalatschan
Giving It Back To Kids